Biblical Signs Your Spouse Regrets Cheating

If you have recently discovered that your spouse has had an affair, you are experiencing one of the most painful times in your life. Sometimes marriages end abruptly once a betrayal has taken place. But there are other times when the marriage can be saved.

Has your spouse come to you and expressed that they regrets their actions? If they have, you may not be sure that you can truly believe them. Nor, should you. It can be helpful to take a look at some Biblical signs that indicate that he is actually repentant and willing to work toward forgiveness and restoration.

Sign #1: They Take Full Responsibility for Their Betrayal

It is possible that you feel some blame for your spouse’s affair. That is normal, even if it is inaccurate. This is something that many individual do, mostly because of outside voices that have told them they could have done things differently.

But a sign of your spouse’s regret is for them to admit that the affair was his fault entirely. We see an excellent example of this in Luke 15:21. This is from the parable of the prodigal son, and in this verse, the son has returned home and is repenting for his actions. He says, “Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son.” He takes full responsibility for his sin. Your spouse should never blame you or indicate that you did anything wrong to cause them to have an affair.

Sign #2: They Are Patient and Understanding with You as You Heal

Your spouse should understand that his actions have done great damage to you and to your marriage. This is damage that cannot be undone by simply saying, “I’m sorry,” and then moving on with life as usual.

In Galatians 5:22-23, Paul talks about the Fruit of the Spirit, and one of them is patience. Your husband should understand that you need to go through a healing process. Your spouse should be willing to stand by you, give you time to heal and offer you any support you need from him.

Sign #3: Your Spouse’s Life Becomes an Open Book

During the affair, there were probably a lot of things about your spouse that you did not know. For example, were they working late most nights? Do they have a lot of discretionary time? Are they secretive about his phone and social media accounts?

If your spouse is truly repentant, his life should immediately become an open book to you. This includes:

  • Making sure you have access to their phone.
  • Telling you what time they will be home and then coming home at that time.
  • Never spending time with opposite sex friends unless you are present.
  • Making sure you have passwords to emails and social media accounts.

Christian Marriage Counseling Can Help

A Christian Marriage Coach and Counselor can help you work through the pain you feel because of your spouse’s affair. I have been able to help many women and couples as they take important steps like disclosing the affair and go through the healing process.

If you would like to make an appointment with me, you can do so by emailing me at, or by filling out the form on my contact page.

If your spouse is demonstrating true regret, together, we can take the steps that are necessary to seek God in healing and then begin restoring your marriage. It is a journey, but is one that I would love to be a part of with you.

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